Melissa Lapin (00:03.894)
Hello everybody, welcome to season two, episode one of After the Well. My name's Melissa, and if you have just found us, thank you for stopping in and giving us some of your time. I really appreciate it, and I hope that you are not disappointed, and I hope you come back. So with that said, I am gonna jump right in. Today is just me. I am not interviewing anyone, but I wanted to start this year off
with some encouragement and I don't know, just a little pep talk for myself that I kind of want you guys to hear. Because as of this recording, I'm about 12 hours past wanting to quit the whole thing. And I know that sounds crazy and it probably goes against everything. Any professional speaker, podcaster.
a person would tell you to say, they would say, don't say this and don't say that. And well, I'm real and I'm honest and I want to be vulnerable with you guys. And as of bedtime last night, I was like, you know what? I just, I don't know. I cannot tell you my thought process in it. I just knew I just really thought I was done. And
Um, but I woke up this morning.
and several things just started coming to my mind. And one of them just kind of happened out of a Bible study that I'm part of is the mirror, what is it, the mirror study Bible group on Facebook. I think that's what it is, the mirror word Bible study Facebook group. And...
Melissa Lapin (02:06.11)
You know, we had some conversation on there and we were studying Luke 5 and we got down to verse 11. And it just caught my attention and it really got a hold of me. But it really didn't. I mean, I kind of started processing it last night during the group, but
This morning when I got up and when I was thinking about it, like I said, get up, I didn't get out of bed till like 11 45 this morning. I wasn't sleeping but I was laying there just connecting with a friend and chit chatting and that kind of thing. You know, just not, not wanting to engage with this day. And that's not usually like me. I mean, I'm not, I don't have 100% days all the time. But
you know, this was just a little bit different. But then I got to thinking about the scripture last night. It was Luke 5 verse 11. And, oh, I don't even have it pulled up. But it taught, it said, you know what? This is so unprofessional. Let me pull this up and y'all talk amongst yourself.
as I do that. Because I have my notes from what I did, but here, let me go. Verse 11, here we go. And again, it's in the mirror translation or mirror interpretation thing. It says, then after bringing the boats to land, they departed from everything that defined them before. Okay, let me read that with the right emphasis.
Then after bringing their boats to land, they departed everything that defined them before and followed him. And you gotta put the right and fastest on the right syllable. And some of you guys will get that reference. But it hit me because instead of looking forward to where the podcast needs to go and where I need to go,
Melissa Lapin (04:30.122)
I've been stuck looking back on all the shoulda coulda woulda's, all the things that it wasn't last year, that it wasn't what I expected it to be. Now, don't get me wrong, I've had an absolute blast. I flipping love doing it. But all the definitions and expectations that I had around that...
I just had to leave. I had to leave. I have, like it said, I have to, to everything that defined what it is that I've been doing, I've had to walk away from and follow him. And all morning long, I've been pondering, just going around and around in my head with it. You know, okay, backing up a little bit, Luke five is a story where Jesus went to the beach.
and by the Sea of Galilee and the crowds were pressing in and he jumped on the boat, the guy's Peter's boat and James and John were there and he's like, Hey guys, okay. They rode him out to the deep and he's like, cast the net to the other side. They're like, we're so tired. We've been fishing all night long and like there's nothing there, but we'll do it because you're Jesus. Okay.
That would have been my attitude anyway. But so they did and they caught bigger fish than they've ever caught. They caught so many fish that it started to rip their nuts, right? And
I've just been wondering, like, can I make one more podcast? Can I cast my net one more time? Because the cool thing, it wasn't that they were just fishing, it was Jesus was with them and he was directing them. And I think we get lost sometimes thinking that we're doing this all by ourselves. And we're not.
Melissa Lapin (06:43.015)
If we have surrendered...
Melissa Lapin (06:48.575)
using that word. If we have
begun to co-labor with Jesus in our dreams.
then he's with us, more so than...
if we've done something and we're just asking him to bless it. Does that make sense? There is a massive difference in that. And...
Side note to tie in, last Friday, the second Friday of January, by the people who study statistics and things have dubbed it Quitter's Day because something like 90 something percent of people have quit their New Year's resolution by the second Friday in January and so they have dubbed it Quitter's Day.
Melissa Lapin (07:49.93)
And there's lots of research to just prove that.
Melissa Lapin (08:00.286)
in
Melissa Lapin (08:03.418)
My whole point in this is to...
let's hash it out, let's break it down to understand.
kind of this is not a goal. This is not a I'm a super gold nerd. I really am. I love John Acuff. If you guys are gold nerds, follow johnacuff.com. He's got a guaranteed goals community. Fantastic podcast called All It Takes is a Goal. I thrive on setting goals and checking the boxes and creating the list and things like that.
I mean, like I'll make a list just so I can put stuff on it, whether it's on my list or not. But anyway.
Melissa Lapin (08:57.903)
Our success.
Melissa Lapin (09:03.074)
is not about how many goals we can make and the stats. And I think a lot of us, even if we realize it or not, are driven by our environment, by our social media experience, by the people we allow to speak in our lives, our communities that encourage us or don't encourage us, our families.
our past and our history, which is huge, because we allow our history to define us. There are layers of our brain, which I'm not like a super geek on that either, but the science of brain chemistry and reprogramming our brain, I kind of dig that stuff. And currently also reading a book.
or listening to an audio book in a group with some friends called, um, mind hacking happiness and, uh, by Sean Webb, mind hacking happiness by Sean Webb. And he just talks about the different layers of our psyche that create this persona of who it thinks we should be. Not that we don't have control of it or not that we can't have control over it, but that we kind of don't.
And so circling back around that when...
Melissa Lapin (10:36.886)
when the guys, like they did the thing. They caught the fish, they brought the fish into the shore.
And then they left everything that identified them. They were fishermen. That's how they were known. That's how their family knew them. That's how the village knew them. That's how the people who bought their fish knew them. Hey, the fisher guys, go get some fish. Let's have some dinner. That's what they did. And we can see in other scriptures that they tried to be, you know, they tried to get accepted into the school to be rabbis. They didn't make the cut.
So what did they do? They went back to what defined them. And they fished. They were just hanging out fishing. I don't think we have a timeline. I've never seen a timeline of how long, you know, how long were they flunkies, you know? How, it's, I think I remember hearing somewhere, again, I'm not a scholar, I don't know, that like Peter was like 19 or 20, you know, so.
What is the age group? When did they get kicked out of being a rabbi? When were they not chosen? Was it six months? Was it five years? I don't know. I would love to know. If you know, let me know. That would be good information to have. But the whole point was they resigned to doing what defined them. I'm a fisherman. I'm gonna fish, it's what I do.
I'm a housewife. It's what I do. I'm a banker. I'm a dad. I work at the auto port store. I'm a salesman. That's what I do. They allowed their, I guess, trade, if you will, or their talent or their give to define them.
Melissa Lapin (12:43.978)
And the second point that I want to make is
Jesus said, I'm gonna make you, Fisher's event, and I love, I'm gonna pull it back up because I really love what he said in this interpretation.
Melissa Lapin (13:06.41)
Darn it. Where did it go? Define them. Oh, here we go. So before they decided to drop everything that defined them to follow Him, this is what Jesus said to them.
Jesus said to Simon, you have nothing to fear from now on you'll likewise be netting people alive. And I think that is really awesome. In the live in there the notes in that he talked about the word talking about zoe life like the ultimate joyous life zoe life.
is the word that Jesus used when he said netting people alive. He'll catch to catch to trap, thus be netting people alive in order to rediscover Zoe life. And this whole thing has apparently been going around in my subconscious. I did not have a dream of any kind. Well, I had actually had a dream. I was on my motorcycle and my dog was riding with me, which never happened.
But that was a fun dream. But when I woke up, all of this revelation was milling around in my head about...
what I need to do and with my podcast, my podcast and any blogging I write or book I publish, books, however many I do, I don't know, publish the things that I...
Melissa Lapin (14:58.262)
bring life to, bring Zoe life to, because of partnering with Jesus, in a way that's me capturing them and kind of netting them and bringing them into the atmosphere that I have created because of my revelation of who Christ is. Does that make sense?
Email me if that doesn't make sense to you. Let's have a conversation. Because I'm still trying to get my head around it as well. But once we encounter Jesus, just like Fatini at the well, she was just doing her thing. She was living in.
the themes that defined her. I've said it a hundred times on my podcast that we don't know anything about her, but every single message we have ever heard taught about her. Anytime the woman at the well is used, she's considered a prostitute. That's why she was at the well at noon. There was shame on her. There's all of this negative BS, basically, because I have found zero proof
any message that I have ever heard about her. I think she's just an easy target.
Melissa Lapin (16:34.006)
but everything that has defined her.
Melissa Lapin (16:40.61)
because she'd been married five times. Why did the husbands die? Divorce was legal in some circles in Samaria versus Judea. We have to look at it through her culture. Was she just kicked to the curb? Why was she kicked to the curb? How old was she? When you've had five husbands, you have to have some age on you, right? Unless they all tragically die one after another, I don't know. We don't know.
but she was living a life with all of these things that defined her in her community. We don't know what she did for a living. She was, I will go to my grave knowing she was not a prostitute. I absolutely do not believe that. I cannot believe that. Was she living with a guy? Yeah, that doesn't make her a prostitute. But so all of these definitions were put on her.
She looked Jesus in his eyeball sitting by that well and said, it's obvious you know who I am. Let's have a conversation. And she began to ask him questions and things that radically transformed her life. And she left the things that defined her in her mind.
to go and believe him. And it said they left the, pull it up again. Gotta love the phone here.
Melissa Lapin (18:21.314)
then after bringing their boats to land, they departed from everything that defined them before and followed him. And that him there, I guess is the Greek word, I don't even know how to pronounce it, E-I-M-I, however you pronounce that. It's the I am. They.
walked away from... there are everything that defined them for their entire lives, all their culture, all their community, their skills, their passions, everything. They walked away from all of it to follow the I Am because they looked him in the eye on that boat and he said, oh, I'm gonna change your life.
I'm going to make you fishers of men. You will catch living men. You will bring them into Zoe life. And they had the courage and the audacity to believe them. They walked away from an inheritance, a heritage of fishing and supplying food for other people. The money that they made as fishermen.
Because can you imagine the reputation? Even if Jesus hadn't have said that to them right then and they didn't follow them right away, can you imagine what that would have done to their business? Come on. A, because Jesus chose to be in their boat. So, you know, we tend to idolize people because of who they hang out with. I wanna get close to them because they're close to them. Kevin Bacon, six degrees of separation, right?
So even just him, his presence, being in their boat could have meant a lot of business, a lot of popularity.
Melissa Lapin (20:27.586)
But they wanted more. They wanted more. They understood the value of what Jesus was saying not only to them, but about them, because he spoke their language of fishing. And Jesus will speak to us and does speak to us in the language that we understand.
Melissa Lapin (21:00.654)
I was asked this morning, or actually last night, and I read the message on Facebook and I am in the messenger and I kind of, I didn't ignore it and I was honored by it, but I set it aside because of how I was feeling about all of it. I don't feel like a failure with the podcast. I just don't feel like it has gotten the traction that I wanted it to.
We all go through those moments, right? That, oh man, my expectations were different and they're kind of not being met right now so let me just sit here for a minute. I just felt stalled, okay?
But I got up this morning and I created, I was asked to do a short share slash teaching on what I'm telling you now. And it was just seven minutes because I didn't want to go too long because it was just a request and a Facebook post because somebody reached out to me and said, hey, can you record what you shared last night in the group so that I can post it in the Facebook group and please put your information.
for your podcast on it.
and I, I did it. It was a joy for me to do it. It energized me because I know it's what I'm supposed to do. I have left everything that defined me.
Melissa Lapin (22:33.038)
to focus on the voice that I know that I carry. And because of this podcast, people will be able to hear it. People around the world, there are people in South Africa listening, there are people in England listening. I have a lady in Korea that is listening and all over the United States. And I think Canada, that's a country too. But...
My whole point is we have to get to the point of understanding that
Melissa Lapin (23:14.322)
Jesus is looking at us face to face in our eyeballs and saying, Hey,
I want to make you... You fill in the blank for you. What is it that burns in your heart that you know he is waiting on you to partner with him? And I feel kind of bad because I like I literally last night when I went to bed I was ready to just pack it all in. I was like I can't. My
Apple Podcast numbers and all the stats and all the things aren't showing a lot of growth or whatever. You know? I'm not getting the replays. I'm not getting the return listeners and all of that. So I allowed myself to get overwhelmed with things that could have defined me.
Melissa Lapin (24:23.06)
It's just a fact.
And I'm not saying, never again, I've risen above that, I've been saved, healed, and delivered, and that's not my mindset, and I've repented, you know? Great. You know, if that works for you, that's fine. I'm just gonna sit here and acknowledge the fact that I had a moment, just a blip in faith in myself, not my faith in God. Because
I'm doing what he asked me to do and if I don't show up for me, then other people are going to miss out. Because if I'm not my best me and I don't and if I don't walk away.
of the definition of me, what I have defined myself by, and walk forth in the definition of what he has said about me, I might as well pack it up, for sure. That's like truth. And so we have to understand that Jesus is looking us in the face. He is...
gotten in the boat with us. He is sitting right here with me next to this microphone and in front of this camera. He is with you at your sewing machine if you're called to be a seamstress and make beautiful clothing and things for people or if it's an art canvas or if it's in front of a computer doing networking or being a CPA or an air traffic controller or a boat captain
Melissa Lapin (26:08.35)
it is that he has gotten into your situation with you. Look him back in his face and say, okay, you know what, Jesus, I am going to leave behind everything that I believed has defined me and I am going to follow. I am.
because I believe that you are not only the god of pre-cross, but you are post-crossed, not the god of provision. You are provision. You are healing. Things drastically changed on the cross. There was a big pivot. And Jesus is the I Am. And
I am choosing to continue this podcast, to continue just moving forward because I know that there's an audience for me and there's an audience for you. Whether it's one person, whether it's a thousand or two thousand or a nation, there is an audience for you.
And you gotta decide if you are going to, like, um, what he said, that you are going to net people alive. Are you going to walk away from what has defined you to partner with what I am says about you to create Zoe life for those in front of you? Oh, mic drop. I think that was the...
The end of the rant. Because we have to redefine ourselves. And that definition can only come from the Father Heart of God. We can only be defined by who Jesus says we are, who Father says we are, and who Holy Spirit shows us that we are. That's the only definition.
Melissa Lapin (28:31.986)
And so I would encourage you, sit with the Trinity, sit with a Godhead and say, Holy Spirit, what do you say about me? How do you define me? Jesus, how do you define me? God, how do you define me? And use that as your new plumb line.
and walk away from those things that have defined you so that you can walk forward creating an atmosphere to catch people and give them Zoe life.
Melissa Lapin (29:08.999)
Yeah.
Melissa Lapin (29:14.255)
good stuff even if I say so myself.
So I hope you're encouraged and I don't know where you are with all of the plans and the New Year's resolutions and if you ended last year well or if your last year was the shit show. You know, I mean, everything there's a gamut of feelings and emotions and mental
Melissa Lapin (29:49.09)
And we hold ourselves to standards and accountabilities and a high bar the last month of the year that we don't even think about the first 11 months. You know? And we do it to ourselves every single year because there are those high achievers that put themselves out there in the public eye and God bless them, good for them. Because I personally find them encouraging to a point. But then I'm just like, oh.
but I haven't done XYZ. I didn't do XYZ. I didn't go XYZ. I shoulda, coulda, woulda. And I do it every stinking year. And I will probably do it at the end of this year too. I hope not. But be encouraged that whatever
parameters, expectations, goals, habits, watermarks, whatever you want to call it for yourself. Do not be defined.
by those things, by wins and losses, by things that other people have said and put on you. Sit with the Godhead and hear what they would say to you about you and for you. Because I would wager that it's far different than what you think about yourself.
and the standards you put on yourself and how you have defined yourself. Start defining yourself through the I AM, through the Godhead. And I would even challenge you to get outside of scripture and not cling to a scripture that we believe in our head and not totally in our heart.
Melissa Lapin (32:01.986)
which I know that's rough to say and that's a whole nother conversation. Because scripture's awesome. I'm not dissing scripture. I love scripture. But there's something much more Zoe life giving when you sit with a Godhead and say, can you tell me what you think of me? How do you see me? Father Jesus, Holy Spirit.
If you don't know how to do that, connect with me, Melissa at afterthewell.org. Hit me up on Facebook, afterthewell.org, Instagram, after.thewell. And we'll talk, we'll have a chat because this is my passion and this is what I do. And I am moving forward. There will be plenty more podcasts in the future along with teachings.
going to be, I think I mentioned it back in December when I did my season one closing episode about having different, a little bit of different flow, still loving the interviews. But I think once a month I'm going to jump on and just do a teaching and encouragement. And because we all need it, I need to hear it. I need to hear these words come out of my mouth to encourage myself because faith comes by hearing.
Melissa Lapin (33:29.122)
My definition is something I have absolutely believe is going to happen, has happened already. That's faith. Not a hope that, oh yeah, I think it's going to happen. I sure hope. Da da da. That's faith. Faith is knowing that something has already happened. And I believe that Jesus has already made a way for me.
he already knows the ears that are going to hear this podcast. And the opportunities I'm going to have because of the podcast. So yes, there will be more podcasts. Yes. I would love for you to share. Yes. I would love for you to rate the podcast, all the things to still play the algorithm game and the game that social media wants us to play, but that's not going to define.
If I have one listener every week, I'm okay with that. Because I got something they need and I say it in a way that they can hear it. And that's my net. I'm okay with that. So I really, really appreciate you guys. I thank you for listening. Thank you for hanging in with me. My little rant. I hope it wasn't too squirrely. I hope it.
it made sense. I think it did. I think it did. I am very encouraged. Go check out the Mirror translation. It's not a translation. None of them are translation. They're all interpretations. Sorry. It just is what it is. But the Mirror Bible is a beautifully written, very in-depth book. I don't think there's the whole Bible. A lot of New Test...
Melissa Lapin (35:24.782)
Greek and Hebrew study right in the scriptures so that you know the words that are used and why he phrased it the way he paraphrased. That's the word. He paraphrased it. I'm not sponsored. I would love to meet what Francis DuTois is the author, I think. Is that how you pronounce that? But I love, I love the mirror and the passion that it's written with. So with that said,
I'm gonna stop talking now because I don't want to be defined as someone who prattles on with nothing to say. But anyway, thank you so very much. I hope you enjoyed it. If you did, let me know you liked it and please share it with someone else. And you know what? Let's all be fish that swim together. Thanks. I appreciate you guys.
